Only A Carbon Footprint Away

The first in a series of regular poetic reviews of Erinsborough’s Ramsay Street – this one a review of the week’s episodes

Susan, Susan, smug and smart,
Swish that cape and steal the part!
‘The Perfect Blend’ left Karl surprised.
(You sure that line ain’t plagiarised?)

Paulie, Paulie, hold it there!
Wife number six so young and fair?
Not your money she is after?
Just your charm? (Cue viewers’ laughter.)

Amy, Amy, handy tradie,
You going back to work so shady?
If you need some saucy gear,
The Blue Box lies in a house quite near.

Toadie, Toadie, do not dredge
The lake to find your lovelock pledge.
You never know what secrets might
Be buried there and come to light.

Karl’s compost plans, or his dollar stash,
Might bob up with a mighty splash.
And, heaven forbid, a watery call
From another love child, son of Paul.

Elly, Elly, you okay?
You haven’t had a drink all day.
You’re doing the things that teachers do.
It’s most absurd and not like you.

Tyler, Tyler, Tyler B,
How dumb are you? You cannot see
That Hamish is a lying creep?
It makes the viewers want to weep.

Yashvi, Yashvi, think you’re cool
To cause a stink that closed the school?
Such pranks as this do not end well.
Ask Piper of her burning hell.

Will Gary and Terese get back
To limbering in the spa or sack?
Will Guy Fawkes go without a hitch?
Is Courtney real or a scheming bitch?

Will Sheila’s heart be a shattered mess?
Should we send for Clive in his fancy dress?
It’s an average week in our favourite place.
So follow this blog and watch this space!

© Carol Ann Wood
Week ending Friday 27 October 2017

Index of Posts:

My bespoke poetry service, Diverse Verse
About the author
Contact the author
Follow Carol Ann Wood on Twitter
Carol’s football-related blog: Levelling the Playing-Field
NOT Just Saying: Carol Anns’s comments on feminism, fashion, food and folly
Perfect Blend

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